The Legion of Doom couldn't do a better job destroying America than the Obama Administration is doing
In the comic books, Lex Luthor ran for President in 2000 as the Tomorrow Party candidate, facing off against Al Gore and George W. Bush, promising hope and change and all sorts of marvelous technological advancements (renewable energy, Kryptonite-green technology, fixing all broken souls, lowering the oceans, fulfilling dreams, lemonade and pixie dust). Through the efforts of community organizing groups in large cities like Gotham and Metropolis, and the unprecedented turnout of not only deceased but completely imaginary voters, Luthor won the presidency to media applause — and promptly began a systematic plan to bring America to its knees, using various cataclysms of his own design as cover for general nefarity, all with his ultimate obsessive goal of killing Superman in mind.
Because that’s who Lex Luthor is.
As absurd as this truly all is, Lex Luther took several years in the comic books to actually achieve any of his crazed, demented goals. And he had Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, and various other spandex and vinyl fetishists thwarting his every move.
Obama’s been in office for 59 days now, and has already caused more havoc and damage than the Legion of Doom ever dreamed of.
He, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Tim Geithner, Steven Chu, Ray LaHood, Eric Holder, Rahm Emanuel, Chris Dodd, Barney Frank, Claire McCaskill, the Kennedy Family, and other terrible Democrats in Washington put Luthor, Catwoman, Toyman, The Joker, The Riddler, Captain Cold, and the rest of the comic books’ rogue’s gallery to shame in their greed, waste, graft, corruption, ineptitude, and grandiose ill-conceived-and-poorly-implemented-schemes.
If the Legion of Doom purposefully wanted to tank the American economy from within, it would not do a better job terrorizing Wall Street, small investors, and average working Americans than the Obama Administration. Doom agents would conjure giant spiders or robot penguins to attack Wall Street head-on, while Joker’s harlequin gang giggled its way through bank after bank, looting as much as they could stuff into comicly large purses and laughable gift bags.
Those criminal clowns have nothing on Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid, who rammed through a Trillion Dollar Spending Bill that no one, NOT A SINGLE DAMN SOUL, actually read in the House or Senate before voting for it. Catwoman never stole so much in one sitting. Toyman never squandered so much treasure on anything so absurd and ridiculous. The Riddler never snuck in so many tricks and surprises (like Chris Dodd’s bonus provisions for corporate executives).
It’s all mind-boggling.
Giethner at Treasury seems determined to chase every last investor away from the market. Dr. Steven Chu, at Energy, has not only declared war on coal producing states like West Virginia, Pennsylvania, and Ohio, but seems hell-bent on starting a trade war with China over carbon emissions tariffs. Kathleen Sebelius, a woman who drove the entire state of Kansas into the ground, is now poised to oversee what will amount to more than $2 TRILLION in healthcare spending. Sebelius has never done anything to warrant confidence and faith in her abilities strong enough to put her in charge of a lemonade stand, let alone reform of America’s Byzantine healthcare system. Why not just give this job to Solomon Grundy, who was born on a Monday, and who, like Sebelius, has all the enthusiasm, energy, and wherewithal of someone who’s been buried in the ground somewhere for half a dozen years.
Every day, there’s a new lie told, and more blame shifted around.
No one reads the legislation the Obama Administration passes, which is deliberate, so that later they can all claim they knew nothing about any of the shocking things that have been going on behind the scenes. “The reason I don’t read the bills I force through the House,” we imagine Pelosi purring, “is so that I’m not responsible for them after people find out what I have done. I very rarely read anything other than clothing labels, and that’s just so I don’t get stuck with any more acrylic. I learned that from Caroline Kennedy who is, you know, so smart about avoiding two things in life: hard work, and acrylic. You know.”
If characters in comic books behaved like Democrats in Washington these days, you’d stop buying those titles, as they’d strain even the most twisted rules of logic in BizarroWorld, and would be impossible to believe.
‘The stock market sank that much, that fast?”
“The national debt tripled in 60 days?”
“The Stimulus Bill wasn’t really a stimulus after all, but just a poorly disguised trillion dollar payback to disparate Democratic constituencies hungry for pork projects after being largely shut out of the trough for the last 8 years?”
Obama’s “stimulus bill” is more wildly successful than anything Lex Luthor ever dreamed up, that’s for sure. Though he employed a classic Legion of Doom tactic (naming something innocuous or even positive, but all the while intending it for another purpose entirely — where Operation Smiley Happy Kitten is really a space-based death ray hovering somewhere in orbit over the moon), Obama was able to pass legislation that in no way actually relates to “stimulus”, but instead commits the federal government to generations of budget deficits, for wasteful pork projects that will entrench themselves and refuse to die long after the CRISIS! Obama and the media brayed about abates on its own (several years later than it would have, without discredited Keynesian interference).
And, once the Trillion Dollar Obama Spending Bill passed, suddenly Obama changed his tune on the CRISIS!, repurposing it as “not as bad as we thought it was”. Good thing we spent One Trillion Dollars on things we don’t need and aren’t able to pay for anyway.
But, Lex Luthor’s plots and schemes all had a larger purpose than just sinking California into the ocean or raising new continents from the Atlantic made from ugly, burnt crystals; they were all designed with an ultimate super-goal in mind, which was forever the elimination of Superman.
What’s Obama’s ultimate goal in all of this?
The elimination of America as we know it?
The creation of New France?
It seems like crisis after crisis is manipulated to keep his poll numbers up for the next four years, so he can land a second term, with the MSM facilitating this in every way they can. Obama clearly loves the perks of the presidency, and all the pomp and circumstance, but does he really care about the American people, or the economic suffering many now share? Does he see his Treasury Secretary is making the economy worse each day he’s on the job, or that his Energy Secretary could inadvertantly start a trade war with China that would resonate instantly on a global level? Does Obama care that no one of any competence oversees the billions being spent by the Transportation and Health and Human Services Departments?
Or is everything he does not about the best interests of Americans, but for some other purpose, personal and all his own, that’s not clear to anyone else?
That’s the question at hand and, unfortunately, unlike anything asked by The Riddler in the comic books, this question actually matters, with real-world consequences unlike anything the Legion of Doom could have come up with.
Comic books are funny and exciting.
The Golden Age of Obama is disconcerting and worrisome.
Where’s Superman when you need him, we ask, thanking Heaven at least we’ve got Wonder Woman in Foggy Bottom keeping the whole world from going to absolute Hell.
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