A Note of Personal Thanks to All Our Friends Out There
I really don’t like talking about my personal health issues because I am loathe to give the trolls and cyberstalkers out there new avenues of personal attack…and allowing them details about my health battle would really be a boon for these people. In the five years that I’ve been running this site and writing political essays I’ve discovered the Internet to be a largely vile and toxic place. That’s mainly because people are allowed to post anonymously and to say and do things under screen names that they’d never in a million years do “in real life”.
Back in Catholic school in Cleveland, the nuns always taught me to never put in writing anything that you wouldn’t publish to the entire world under your real name…because anything you’d be ashamed of following you around forever is probably something you shouldn’t write to begin with…or even allow into your heart.
Last February, one of my favorite people in the entire world died suddenly…though I can’t say altogether “unexpectedly”. In the gay world, most guys have a patron diva…a larger-than-life female singer or actress who is a lifelong personal favorite. Older guys had Cher or Barbra Streisand or Liza Minnelli/Judy Garland or whoever…and I have Whitney Houston. When I was younger, I was lucky enough to see her in concert a handful of times and I even had the extremely rare chance of not just meeting her but actually spending a few hours hanging out with her when I worked at a hotel she stayed in. She was sweet, charming, funny, classy, and so incredibly kind that afternoon I spent with her…and that’s how she’s always remained in my memory.
But, when Whitney died last February the full evil of the Internet hate machine revved up against her…and maybe I was foolish for being so surprised by that. The entertainment site EW.com was the absolute worst, with no spam or troll filter on the articles about Whitney…which resulted in just a nonstop barrage of hateful and even legitimately racist things said about this woman because of her various life issues and problems. It breaks my heart that someone so talented and sweet fell so far because of drugs…and that she just couldn’t turn her life around. There aren’t even words to express how horrific it feels to realize just how evil the Internet can be…remembering all the things that anonymous posters said about Whitney in those first hours and days after her death. Hell, the trolls and haters are STILL at it even today. Just go to any video of hers on YouTube and you’ll see this garbage.
Anonymity and the act of sitting down in front of a computer where no one can see you allows far too many out there license to manifest pure evil into the world…and I’ve come to realize that there is just no stopping that and putting the genie back into the bottle.
I used to think it was just political sites that attract these kinds of trolls and stalkers…but seeing this stuff at play on entertainment sites made me realize it is a much bigger problem than that. My boyfriend Justin is really into video games and graphic design and other interests like that…and even on the forums and sites he visits for his work or hobbies this same kind of anonymous hate permeates everything. And it comes flying out of nowhere too, with anonymous people hiding behind screen names constantly attacking people who are famous or known in any way. And the attacks are merciless too. They even happen on sites that are supposedly for fans of Disney, which is probably the biggest shock of my lifetime; there actually are websites out there are purport to be about a love of Disney theme parks…but the people who anonymously post there actually do nothing but gripe about or malign the thing they claim interests them most. It’s dumb(o)founding.
There are times when I really wonder if the Left has completely won and if hatred and evil control our world completely at this point. Many of the patriotic people I’ve gotten to know over the last five years have thrown in the towel and no longer want anything to do with politics or what’s happening to our country. They cede victory to the Left and have resolved to just ride out the approaching storm as best they can…in an Aesop’s fable kind of way, where they are the ants who see the writing on the wall and the Left is the triumphant grasshoppers who’ve taken over…but are too stupid to see that their actions are inviting doom.
I think we are at a very serious crossroads for our country but that our future is not at all uncertain.
I truly believe that America will survive…will persevere….and will emerge stronger than ever. I believe this for the simple fact that for the last 200 years every evil that’s manifest in the world has declared war upon America…and America has won. It’s just unfortunate for all of us to be here at this particular time in history…or, weirdly fortunate if you’re someone who takes personal satisfaction in being one of the people alive today who are able to do something — anything at all — to turn things around.
We’re very much in the Empire Strikes Back phase of things, with the Left feeling secure in its victories and gleeful in pummeling those who want Americans to be free to chart their own destiny. I’ve had a lot of time on bed rest and in recuperation to think about life and what I want to do with the precious days I have in me. Having your health collapse and not being able to do anything about it is a very scary thing…up to a point…until that day that you just let go and “let God”.
It is immensely difficult, physically and emotionally exhausting, and financially devastating to do so…but I love and take immense pride in standing up to the Left in whatever little way I can. When I was too sick to sit at a computer or too weak to be able to type I’d long to be here at the controls of HB smacking back at the Left and resisting the Ministry of Truth that is our national media in any way that I could. More than anything, I wanted to be here putting out content that is positive and determined and that doesn’t succumb to the fatalist belief that there’s absolutely nothing that can be done about the Left’s triumph over our beloved country.
I know it’s breaking Godwin’s Law, but I can’t help feeling weird echoes of the 1930s and 1940s….the last time evil seemed so triumphant in its march…but in the end the 1000-year reign of America’s enemies collapsed much sooner than its orchestrators ever imagined. And that was because good people…of perhaps the Greatest Generation…took a stand and made the sacrifices necessary to stand up to the evil of their time.
Without suffering and struggle joy and happiness disappear into the commonplace. It seems that every so many decades our world needs to be embroiled in some great civilizational conflict, where the forces of good battle the manifestation of true evil…where one shall stand and one shall fall and so many heroes rise to their call of duty (some so unexpectedly).
I feel so blessed to have encountered a vast pantheon of heroes through the running of this site over the last five years. Most of these people will never be famous, but they are truly the most wonderful souls I ever imagined I’d meet. Almost all of them are regular readers of this site and dear friends I wish I had time and energy to be in better contact with. But they all remain in my heart and in my thoughts because I know they all have a role to play in the years ahead as we move into the third act of the current drama plaguing our nation…and segue from the Empire Strikes Back to the Return of the Jedi of things.
I really love being a child of the 80s and mining idioms from Star Wars movies. It’s a little disconcerting being 36 now and realizing that my cultural touchstones are often lost on the Millenials and the generations coming behind them. It’s downright scary to appreciate that all of these kids raised in public schools and subjected to anti-American nonsense and “global citizens” brainwashing are becoming adults and will soon be running things…just as the gray-haired-ponytailed radicals of the 60s are finally entering their 70s and 80s and dropping into their graves.
It’s a harsh reality, this fact that the Millennials have been so indoctrinated that in many ways they are WORSE than the “Weather Underground” types that orchestrated the Left’s surge to power back in 2008.
I know people who focus on all of this and become so overwhelmed with grief for lost freedom and angst for our predicament and they just shut down. They surrender all hope and resign themselves to a bleak and meager existence, just waiting for the Left to finish the deal and come for them…like those lumbering and monstrous walking tanks the Empire sent at the rebels on that bleak ice planet when it “stuck back”. I just can’t imagine being someone who’d ever give up, though, no matter how badly the odds are stacked against us.
Even with my health gone and my body a complete, falling-apart mess at the moment I don’t want to give up…or stop being a thorn in the Left’s side. Enough little thorns working together become a forest…and a large enough forest of thorns can swallow up the fiercest and most Leftist of would-be empires.
I think all of the struggle is ultimately indeed worth it because in the end we will win…as others like us have won in the past…and America’s future will ultimately be safeguarded for another 30 or 40 years for the generations behind us. I wish I could say that this will be the last time that an anti-American evil is ascendant…but no doubt in the decades ahead some other force will rise up to oppose America, like a Hydra that just keeps growing another head. It’s especially challenging that the forces that want America destroyed this time around aren’t headquartered in Berlin or Moscow or London or even Mecca…but are in Washington, DC itself.
Perhaps our generation will ultimately prove to be the greatest of them all…because if we don’t surrender and we don’t give up and if we find a way to keep going in defense of the country we love then we’ll overcome obstacles that no generation before us has ever faced.
Like, the Internet…which can be a remarkable force for good when used properly and by responsible people who seek to shine light on wrong-doing and to ring the alarm when needed…or it can be a tool of great evil when employed by anonymous trolls and other villains to seek, destroy, and annihilate those who stand in the Left’s way.
It’s tough being in the middle of all of this and trying to gain perspective on how all of this will shakeout…but it’s comforting to take refuge in my faith and to know that my God is an awesome and loving God who truly set America up as a City on a Hill to lead the world toward light…a bastion of good in a world often roiled by evil.
I have that faith, and in many ways I feel it’s stronger than ever.
Just like one day when my body is healed and my strength is returned and my health is back to where it once was (and I have faith it will be), I will be so grateful for and appreciative of what I have in ways I never thought to be before I had this taken from me. It’s sad but true that too many of us have to come precariously close to losing something value before we appreciate its value.
I think America…and what it stands for…is one of those things that so many took for granted until 2008. The five years since have been our struggle as we watched the Left claim victory after victory and do more harm to what we loved, leaving everything in a weakened and ruined state.
But the future is about us reclaiming what was lost and stolen and never again in our lifetimes forgetting how much it all means or how precious it really is.
I really thank the good friends of this site who’ve sent so many wonderful prayers and words of concern and encouragement our way while I’ve struggled with my health. It really means the absolute world to me and I am so grateful to have so many people out there care about me on a personal level like that. I never expected something like that, so it’s an unexpected blessing that is intensely humbling.
I am happy to be back to work and in command here at Buzzquarters again…and though it might take a while for me to get back to full steam, I do hope we can take the road ahead as friends together. It will no doubt be a trying and difficult road…but such is the nature of anything and everything worthwhile.
© 2013, Kevin DuJan. All rights reserved.
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Amen, and amen! Welcome back to the command center, Kevin. Prayers going out for your recovery.
Because I started out with the categories in the banner, it took me a minute or two longer than it should have to complete the search that flummoxed the nice Mr Gilbert. Once I said D’OH, use the search box on the right–easy peasy.
The only reason I believe the law firm’s filthiness is there’s photos, and Kevin would not lie about the washroom. I know I’ve never seen anything like what he describes. When I remember some places that offended me, they were well&truly clean compared to this!
Welcome back Kevin!
Kevin, I have missed you. Sending prayers your way, hoping for a speedy recovery from whatever ails you. You are a treasure!
Welcome back.
You capture the grief of our times so eloquently. It’s a terrible painful grief. Who can hear America the Beautiful or the Battle Hymn of the Republic without tearing up. I love you for sharing your thoughts with those of us who mourn with you.
These are Bible times, Kevin. A stiff-necked chosen people with golden idols and no Moses to pull his hair out before God over us.
My suggestions:
ChurchMilitant.TV so we remember our true destiny.
Read the Psalms.
Daily Mass.
May God give us all, but especially you Kevin, the grace to fight the good fight.
I am so very happy to see you back! I pray that you will soon regain your health.
As a Floridian, I am smarting from the betrayal of my Governor. He ran on an antiObamacare platform and now he has changed his mind and doomed us all in this state.
I have always been an optimist, but Kevin, I am so tired and no matter how hard I try, I can’t see a light at the end of this tunnel.
God Bless.
Kevin, I have really missed you. I love reading this site and enjoy your
comments. My prayer for you is that you will have a full and speedy recovery. We need more people like you speaking up and we desperately need a real leader on our side. Look forward to hearing
more from you and may our Savior surround with His love and healing.
Welcome Back, Kevin. I have checked this site everyday hoping you would be here soon. Sending best wishes for your good health.
Periwinkel in Kentucky
Best wishes on your recovery, having a health scare puts things in ones life into perspective..
Kyle
God Bless you Kevin. Glad to hear you are feeling better and getting well. I too grew up in the 80′s and often reflect on that life and seeing it erode in front of my eyes is almost depressing. We take great care in the work we do in our neighborhood to ensure that we all survive the doomsday if it’s on our plate.
Stay Strong my Fellow Americans- We Shall Survive
Kevin,
I am so glad to have you back. You are in my prayers for a return to your full health. Yes, I want you back in the fight, but we all have to realize that we can live lives of great fulfillment on our own terms even if the political system fails us. Socrates lived in such times and so did Christ.
Remember all the friends who care for you and those who look for your inspiration at this site. That is a triumph in itself and perhaps an even more important one than a political win.
Welcome back, Kevin! Glad to see you are on the mend!
Hi Kevin…..So glad to see you back where you belong!!!
We are all praying for your return to good health…soon.
Mamallama
So glad I read this…I didn’t even know you were ill. I’m glad you are feeling better now. (We were all kind of sick after last November, though, ha ha!) I love your blog and YOU Kevin. Full steam ahead! You are wonderful.
Glad you are back and will pray you have a complete recovery very soon! Do what you can, but don’t work so hard you have a setback!! Take care and God Bless.
Praying for good health for you Dear Kevin.May God bless you.Much love and big hugs to you.
Many, many :hugs: I will continue to think about you and to pray for you. Would you please do the same for us?
Welcome back, Commander HB!
Like everyone else, I wish you a full and speedy recovery. And, like so many others, I have been checking this site regularly to get your thoughts on all that is happening.
For all of you feeling discouraged – by all means – take a break from time to time to ‘refresh’ yourself. But, NEVER GIVE UP!. It’s what the Left wants you to do. They overwhelm you to the point that you feel
you can’t invest in it anymore. Just tune into this site and folks like RUSH, O’Reilly, Steyn, Monica Crowley, Dennis Miller and Greg Guttfield. Otherwise, you are wimping out. We’re all better than that.
Hi, Kevin. What a nice surprise to check Hillbuzz and find new postings from you! I’m very glad you’re feeling well enough at the moment to share your thoughts on current events. It’s reassuring to read that you expect to make a full recovery. Take the time you need to look after yourself. We’d rather have you recover sooner than push yourself too hard and delay things.
Best wishes.
I’ve been worried about you! I had big hopes that the Reggie Love beach party would perk you up; and sure enough, you’re back! Hope you’re feeling stronger everyday…stay out of the slush!
I’m concerned about people trying to consolidate their personal power in the name of the Tea Party: I believe there are much bigger fish to fry than Karl Rove. I have to agree that at this point candiates have to be winners, or what’s the point? On the other hand, people like Cuomo, Rahm or Biden thinking they can capture the hearts of Americans the way Obama has, have got to be kidding. They’re going to need an awful lot of people voting six times each. How will Conservatives prevent that from happening, when Dems are determined to make the voting process even easier?
So glad to see you are back Kevin but so sad to hear you are still frail in health. You more than make up for that frailty of body in strength of mind and heart. I will remember to pray for you. I prayed each time I checked the site and it had not moved. Now I will remind myself to pray for you when I see new posts. God bless you and keep you, Kevin.
I too was shocked at the vile things that were said about Whitney. In fact, I unfriended a few classmates over their comments on FB. Nobody is perfect, we are all just humans. Somehow they believed that she “deserved it.” How cruel!!
I am comforted and relieved to see you are back!
Kevin,
I wonder if any of what I have experienced rings true for you as well.
http://jennyhatch.com/2011/09/21/political-blowback-on-health-freedom-activist-jenny-hatch/
I would pay all of your health bills if I had the money…
Jenny
Love you, Brother!
Walk in Peace, Strength, and Beauty.
Newt
Have been a long time reader, Kevin and have been worried about you. So glad you are back. So sorry you have not got your health back yet. Will be praying for a complete recovery and good health to return to you quickly. Love to read your postings. Welcome back. Do take care and God bless. Hugs to you!
Wonderful essay, Kevin! I’ve missed reading your lovely work taking it to the left!
I’m sorry you’ve been so ill, and am glad you are back in command at the Buzz-quarters. You have been missed. Take good care of yourself. God bless you, Kevin!
Kevin, I have missed your presence at Hillbuzz. I am so glad you’ve begun posting again. Please take it easy and don’t overtax yourself as you regain your strength. May God surround you with His love and Grace and heal you.
Lynn
Thanks for standing up, Kevin.
So good to see you back…prayers for your continued strength.
You have no idea how happy I am that you are back. I will keep you in my prayers for a full and speedy recovery. God Bless you Kevin.
Words can’t express how happy I am to hear you are back and at the helm. Prayers for continued healing going up as I type. Thank you for all you do, Kevin DuJan.
So thankful that you have healed enough to come back, Kevin. I have checked this site regularly, hoping to see you.
Have you joined teapartycommunity.com yet?
I hope you regain all of your strength and energy fivefold.
Prayers going out for your full recovery.
In the midst of the nonsense of this world right now, I am reading the Gospel According to St. Luke. Jesus has defeated the forces of evil; the world has not realized his victory yet. The realization comes when, one by one, we embrace the way of true justice, freedom, and peace–not a utopia promised by a would-be god like Obama, but the joys of the Kingdom of God.
Psalm 46 is what I am clinging to, as well: “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore, we will not fear though the earth be moved and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea.” This psalm forms the basis of the great Luteran hymn, “A Mighty Fortress Is Our God.” (Our helper he, amid the flood of mortal ills prevailing.)
I’m also happy to see you back — the Lord has placed you on my heart numerous times, and each time I’ve sent up some prayers for you.
Yes, the Internet is not a nice place at all.
The vile comments at someone else’s death are disgusting.
Either read or get an audio copy of FA Hayek’s “The Road to Serfdom” (check you library’s website to see if they have an Overdrive type service for checking out audio books to your computer) — he could have written it today (scary). Also read Ayn Rand’s “Capitalism: The Unknown Ideal” — also could have been written today (also scary).
Psalm 46 is a wonderful passage to cling to. <3
Glad you are back Kevin! Thought you might like to read this- as it mirrors your WH sentiments from a perspective few can offer:
http://roxboroghreport.blogspot.com/2012_02_01_archive.html
Just for balance, there’s also anonymous love and caring on the internet: http://www.reddit.com/r/gaming/comments/191ahc/i_wrote_a_silly_post_a_month_ago_about_how_skyrim/
Kevin — Here is something off topic but you might find it interesting. I know from reading your site that you’ve long believed Obama has Parkinson’s disease. (It could explain those scars on his head which, unbelievably, he hasn’t had to explain to anyone.) Obama recently announced that he was committing a ton of money to a new brain mapping project, similar in scope to the Human Genome Project. That seemed a bit out of the blue to me, then I remembered the scars. If he has Parkinson’s, I’m sure that is why brain mapping became a priority in this time of austerity. The link below explains the project.
http://io9.com/5986161/heres-how-obamas-brain-mapping-project-will-actually-work
Kevin, I am so pleased to see you back posting again. I normally check to see if there are new posts via my Reader.
The political landscape is proving interesting in Australia and hopefully we will be rid of our Marxist by September this year. The trouble is, she has decided to use the Obama playbook… but I think that those most likely to vote ALP in Western Sydney for example are seeing right through her stunts.
These are interesting times indeed.
I hope that you will continue to recover your health.
Kevin;
I think you are smart to keep the details of your health private. When you are not here regularly, I assume that you aren’t feeling well, and I pray for you. I pray for you anyway, but I specifically pray for God to wrap His arms around you and give you the strength you need to heal. I also pray for your caregivers and health care professionals. I’m sure that there are many of us who do this when you’re not around, so I hope you feel the love coming at you from cyberspace.
I am so glad you’re back! I know that it is soon time for me to take a stand, and I’m not sure exactly what I will do. You inspire me.