Archive for March, 2010
Friday Open Thread: March 26th, 2010
What’s on your minds this Friday?
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Here’s an issue we’ve been very loathe to ever address, because we’ve never liked the concept of “Board Mommas” and have always resented places like TelevisionWithoutPity.com, where they have moderators that delete comments if they aren’t filed under appropriate threads, and if people try to hijack threads and talk about various tangential things that relate to nothing at all in the article at hand.
They’re VERY strict at TWOP, which is why we never post there, despite enjoying the site as a catch-up when we don’t have access to shows we like but want to know what’s going on. It feels almost impossible to post in the correct thread over there. Is something speculation about what’s going to happen in future episodes? If it is, then is must not be in a Spoilers thread, because that’s ONLY for when you have read somewhere that something is DEFINITELY going to happen, but you must have a quotable source for it to be an OFFICIAL spoiler. If not, it’s an UNATTRIBUTABLE SPOILER, and there’s a special thread for that.
Madness.
We will never, ever, be like that.
BUT, we’ve been reviewing the feedback we received the other day when we asked what things you want to see improved in the future around here.
One of the things that came up a lot, in both that thread and the emails we’ve received on the topic, is that we allow too many thread hijackings.
Actually, unless someone says something nasty about Hillary Clinton, Sarah Palin, ourselves, or other people we like, we don’t block any comments and we don’t have a way to move remarks to threads that fit better…so it’s pretty much a free for all in terms of comments.
We don’t think many of you appreciate the weirdness it causes when you just randomly post a comment about something totally unrelated on a thread about another topic. For instance, just say we have a thread up about Healthcare…and then someone hijacks the comment thread and posts some BREAKING NEWS! item about something stupid that’s happened in the White House, which will only be relevant for all of two hours.
A year later, when someone’s searching for info on that Healthcare topic, and finds that thread, smack in the middle of comments is a long stretch of remarks and counter remarks about the random thing someone hijacked the thread with. It makes little sense, and is of little use to anyone at a later date.
We see a lot of remarks that start with, “sorry to hijack this thread” or “I know this is not the right place” and “O/T, but…”.
It’s taken two years to reach this point for us, but we do finally understand why TWOP and places like that are so strict. Staying on topic in a post and the subsequent comments is important. It really takes away from the discussion of a topic when people hijack threads to insert randomness.
There is an Open Thread every day.
Open Threads are 100% random.
You should not post BREAKING NEWS in threads that are not open threads, unless the breaking news is in relation to whatever topic is being discussed in another post.
Great Merciful Zeus, we hated typing those last few sentences. It’s too Board Momma for us. We don’t want to be those guys.
But, we do realize a balance needs to be struck here…the random posting of O/T things should be limited to the Open Threads. We think discussion on topics would be better, and the posts themselves would be better resources of information in the future. Chances are, if something left in Open Threads is important enough, we’ll create a thread for it of its own, based on the tips left in Open Threads.
With most BREAKING NEWS items that’s just what happens.
We’d love to hear ideas on how we can improve this area going forward — and what you personally think about Board Mommas, moderators, and this sort of thing. As we look at what we can do for the new site going forward, this is a major area we are focusing on, so that comments and interaction is an enjoyable factor for everyone.
We just wish people would stay on topic more and use the O/T less…and hate having to admit that, yes, TWOP really does have a point in doing things they way they do after all.
Question: Could Muslims start using breast implants to crash planes?
We all better hope they never weaponize Falafel the Hutt. A bomb in his mansiere could take out the eastern seaboard.
Drudge linked to this story just now, with speculation that Muslims could start using women with breast implants to crash planes and murder thousands in the future.
The Religion of Peace, showing the only ingenuity and progress it’s made for going on a thousand years now.
We’ve touched on this subject before, and still believe the next wave of attacks Muslims wage on air travel will be Diaper Bombs, where they’ll hide explosives in either diapers themselves, diaper bags, or in the formula bottles taken on board planes with infants in tow. We do not believe for a moment these murderous zealots will think twice about killing small children along with all the other innocents taken out in the name of Allah and, you guessed it, The Religion of Peace.
We also think the article above is wrong in assuming the breast implants will be given to women.
There are a lot of grotesquely obese Muslim men in the world. The House of Saud alone accounts for thousands.
What’s to stop any of those Jabbas from having large amounts of explosives sewn up into their gynecomastia?
Working as a team, two Jabbas packing the heat could fly with an accomplice or two, who possibly has the triggering mechanisms hidden in artificial limbs, a wheelchair, or maybe even the diaper bag/bottle scenario. Once they are all through the airport scanners, they can assemble all of this in a bathroom. Since airport police are concerned only with catching wayward closeted Senators toe-tapping in stalls, they’d seem free to hook the detonators up to the Jabbas and be good to go, ready to board Flight #911 to Terror.
Clearly, we’re never told everything the intelligence and security world knows about what Muslims are up to — but we think there’s a solid reason so many airports are pushing for full-body x-ray scanners…and it’s not because many in the TSA want to catch Jake Gyllenhaal naked whenever he flies anywhere. That’s why WE’RE lobbying for those x-ray scanners at O’Hare and Midway, but it very well could be that Muslims are already working on plastic surgery explosives to start bringing down planes and murdering scores of innocent civilians.
The Religion of Peace.
Stopping at nothing to prove itself an oxymoron since 622AD.
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UPDATE: We forgot to mention in the above that Muslim men are apparently already having explosives sewn into their butts, in what will surely be called “Booty Bombs” and will become the most dangerous weaponization of a derriere since the last chili day at Harpo Studios.
And since Al Queda’s taken up this plastic explosive surgery quest to hide explosives in mounds of flab, all we can say is thank Hera Oprah’s not Muslim. It is probably the nicest thing we will ever say or think about the woman, but for this we are grateful.
Andrew Breitbart takes on the Race Industry: challenges race-baiter (and Steny Hoyer's boyfriend) John Lewis to put up or shut up
The only one shouting inappropriate things that day was John Lewis himself (pictured here holding his boyfriend Steny Hoyer's hand)
Andrew Breitbart has offered a $10,000 reward to anyone who can provide him with video from Sunday March 21st, 2010 that supports disgraced race-baiter (and Steny Hoyer’s boyfriend) John Lewis’ claims he was repeatedly called a “n*****” as he and Steny held hands and waltzed across the Capitol grounds en route to urinate on our Constitution.
Perhaps, at last, the Race Industry has run out of crying wolf free passes.
America at large needs to challenge the Race Industry whenever it claims “n*****” is used and the MSM takes those lies and runs with it.
There were THOUSANDS of people watching John Lewis and Steny Holder hold hands lovingly on Sunday, prancing with Nancy Pelosi to “their historic victory”.
THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE.
Almost all of them, we bet, had cell phones on them at the very least. 90% of those cells have the capacity to record video images, even if it’s shoddy.
At least 50% of the people there had digital cameras with basic video recording capabilities.
It’s impossible to believe no less than 25% of the people with cameras on them weren’t recording Lewis, Hoyer, and Pelosi’s hand-holding waltz across the grounds. From every shot we’ve seen of this, there are dozens of hands raised in the air holding their cameras. A good many of them MUST have decent audio of the ambient sounds of that waltz.
So, where are all the videos showing the crowd shouting N*****! to justify the Race Industry’s broken record cries of RAAAAAACISM!.
Breitbart’s calling these people out…and calling Steny Hoyer’s boyfriend a liar.
Because John Lewis is a liar.
He is a shameless, disgraced, race-baiting, opportunistic, liar.
We’re grateful to Breitbart for telling it like it is.
AND, we’re so sick of this garbage that we’re going to reinstitute our tradition from the 2008 campaign, where every time the Race Industry or the MSM screams RAAACISM! where no racism exists, we’re going to run shots of super hot muscle hunk guys in their underwear, so Internet searches for John Lewis, the Race Industry, Al Sharpton, Henry Gates, Jesse Jackson, Eric Holder, and all the other race-baiters bring up endless pics of smoking hot himbos in their undies.
The black community is notoriously and unapologetically homophobic. The Left, in general, despite its lip service, is also virulently anti-gay, despite guys like Anderson Cooper facing the MSM, which is a de facto propaganda arm of the DNC. So, if these people want to scream RAAACISM!, we’ll address their homophobia by forever associating them with gym bunnies in their jock straps. Something tells us those Democrats working in the West Wing today that were regulars of Man’s Country back when they lived in Chicago sure won’t be complaining.
By the looks of John Lewis’ inexplicably bizarre decision to hold Steny Hoyer’s hand on Sunday, when they weren’t even crossing the street, maybe he won’t complain either.
Trolls on other sites being examined by the New York Times
The trolls bedraggling Harry Knowles are being field-studied by the Gray Lady.
We really like Harry Knowles over at www.Aintitcool.com. For some reason, he’s drawn himself as a space baby in the picture above on his site, but we say more power to him. Maybe he really is a space baby at heart. Unlike Leftists, we don’t impose our will on others. Let Knowles have his space baby dreams.
Joaquin’s from Texas and has spent a lot of time in Austin, where Knowles is based, and says he was a very nice guy on the two or three occasions in which he’s met him (at the Alamo Draft House, where Knowles hosts movie events…and not at some weird space baby convention Joaquin snuck off to). For the uninitiated, AintItCoolNews is a movie/TV site we’ve been following since 1997 or so. The site itself has existed for much longer than that, and like us, its creator just sort of stumbled into it one day. Knowles’ passion is movies, and he has a very interesting backstory, having grown up in a household full of old movie collectors, traveling the country selling posters and rare prints, decades before VHS tapes brought old movies home to everyone.
AintItCool is unapologetically liberal and, in our opinion, sexist and misogynist most of the time. They hate Hillary Clinton. They hate Sarah Palin. Endlessly, the young men who post in comments over there prove their heterosexuality and masculinity by taking nasty swipes at one another, making jokes about rape on a regular basis, and generally throwing their own feces at the walls of their mothers’ basements (and then making her clean it up, after she’s made them some Stouffer’s macaroni and cheese and served it with those little plastic sporks so they don’t hurt themselves).
We follow Hollywood because, unlike Republicans, we realize how much movies, television, and entertainment coverage shape public opinion in the political world. There is no ignoring Hollywood. It must be monitored constantly, even if you don’t like a single thing it puts out. Just because you refuse to see certain movies doesn’t mean millions of others won’t, and be influenced by them.
If you want to have any sort of grasp on what the public is thinking and doing, you need to understand what films are in the pipeline — because the massive budgets of those pictures mean the studios have spent fortunes investing in the market research and consumer analysis to scry into the future and know, to some degree of accuracy, what people will be in the mood to see in the next year or so.
From that, we try to extrapolate what mood people will be in when it comes time to vote. It’s not an exact correlation, but it’s helpful enough that we keep reading movie sites. And, of course, there are many more shots of shirtless Jake Gyllenhaal being awesome over at Knowles’ lair than we can ever find at RealClearPolitics, for whatever reason (RAAACISM!).
Today, AintItCool proved useful for another reason, as an article Knowles posted made us think about trolls on other sites, outside the political realm.
In short, Knowles has hateful, crazed, hobgoblins of his own to contend with, just as we have critters from Daily Kos and DemocraticUnderground who send us endless hate mail and various feces-coated nastygrams. Because he’s not gay, Knowles doesn’t get the charming “die from AIDS, faggots!” broken record we do, just because we don’t agree with the Left, but he’s a large red-headed main with a crazy goatee, so he receives unimaginably cruel remarks about his weight, his marital performance, his looks, you name it.
It’s brutal, and Knowles doesn’t wade into anything 1/10th as controversial as an average day around here — exempt whenever he’s talking about Star Wars or Star Trek, in which case passions ignite and the feces fly. The trolls over there become as riled up about SciFi movies and their merits as Leftists do whenever anyone fails to pay proper homage to their Lightbringer.
It’s actually quite legendary in Internet circles just how deranged “talkbackers”, as Knowles calls them, are over at AintItCool. So much so that the New York Times apparently wants to study them to determine why, exactly, these people are so mad — and why they vent that anger in such malicious, childish, and vengeful ways.
It’s surprising the Times shows any interest whatsoever in determined what makes “talkbackers” so unhinged. Clearly, the reporter is not making the connection that the “talkbackers” on AintItCool are Leftists, but Leftists who just don’t spend their time talking about politics. They talk about movies instead, mainly, but if politics does come up, they are 95% Kool-Aid drinking, hopium smoking, card-carrying Obots over there.
The same behavior they evidence on a movie site is the very same behavior they show over at Daily Kos.
Somewhere, in fact, we wonder if there’s a country garden site with a troll or two, wishing AIDS or other calamities on the editors and writers there, because they think azaleas are not getting the homage they deserve, because of RAAACISM! no doubt.
The Times won’t write the story that really needs to be written — namely, what’s wrong with an entire generation of young men that they are so chock full of hate, and vent that fire and brimstone so casually in “talkbacks”?
What drives these guys (and yes, it’s mainly guys who engage in the worst of this garbage, both at AintItCool and here)?
Do they have any idea how they come across?
Will a sizable percentage of them die from strokes and heart attacks, after living their first 18-23 years so consumed with all of that bile?
The New York Times is trying to interview Knowles’ trolls to figure out what makes them tick, but only in reference to a movie site.
The Times won’t connect that bad behavior back to the Left itself, and what its young, male adherents do every day all across the Internets in service to their Lightbringer.
Most bizarre of all, if you go over to AintItCool and read the comments on that thread, you’ll see many of the trolls HATE the New York Times, despite the fact both the Times and the trolls are clearly tools of the Left.
It’s interesting they aren’t buddy-buddy, since both bow before Dr. Utopia and his Golden Age of Hope and Change.
Perhaps those Leftists just hate everything and only want to watch the world burn.
New site feedback: how important is it to you for HillBuzz to load easily onto mobile devices?
Here’s a very specific question as we think about how we want a new site structured: how important is it for HillBuzz to load easily and clearly onto mobile devices like the iPhone, Blackberries, etc.
We are not tech guys, but some of you out there have been kind enough to email us with various ideas, and a question that keeps coming up is how many of you out there read us not on PCs at home, but on some sort of mobile device.
Can as many of you chime in on this as possible to give us some market research here? We have no idea where you are reading us, so we don’t know what to do about the mobile question yet. We know whatever we do needs to be easily accessible via Facebook, Twitter, and other social platforms…but we’d like to know how focused we need to be on making sure a new HillBuzz looks the way we intend it to on PCs, Macs, mobile devices, and whatever else.
We appreciate the technical feedback and help with this question.
Question: Would you be interested in reading a HillBuzz book?
One of the comments we’ve received a lot from many of you in the last two days is “You guys should write a book”.
So, we’d really like your feedback on this point specifically.
Would you read a book about HillBuzz, how we came to be, our adventures on the 2008 Hillary campaign, then our campaigning for McCain/Palin, and everything that we’ve done since The Golden Age of Hope and Change began?
Do you think other people out there who don’t know about us would like to read it?
What sort of things would you like to see in it?
What should we cover?
What stories that we’ve already told you would you like to see us collect into a book?
We’re willing to put the effort into this if you think it’s worthwhile…and if you can help us get a feel for exactly what sort of tome from us you think people would buy.
With your encouragement and support it can happen…but it’s still such a weird concept for us to believe somebody would want to go to Borders and pick up 200 pages of our nonsense and keep flipping the pages cover to cover like that.
We seriously want your honest feedback and ideas. If you want to see this happen, now’s the time to chime in.
Thursday Open Thread: March 25th, 2010
What’s on your minds today?
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We really want to thank everyone again for responding to yesterday’s call for ideas, in terms of what we can improve going forward as we work towards creating a new site with a lot more flexibility for us.
We’re taking notes on everything that was said and are compiling it into a spreadsheet to see what the most common thoughts were. In a nutshell, we’re going to keep doing what we are doing, but enhance things in a way we haven’t been able to.
What we’d like to do is find a way to bring all of you into Buzzquarters with us, and give you more of a sense of what our little world here in Boystown is like, and how exciting some of the adventures can be, especially when we’re researching something we think is important.
We promise we won’t get too fancy or cluttered. But we are going to build into a new site a prominent ACTION ITEMS board, right at the top, where we can all work on important projects together each day. Everything else will pretty much be the same, except we’d like to fall into the habit of posting one column a day we’ll feature, that we’d love to see syndicated on other sites, in newspapers, and magazines…the way Michelle Malkin and others do. She has her fun items, her laughs, and all the reactions to news the way we do…but she’s evolved a step beyond us with her daily syndicated column. That’s a major challenge for us, but we’d like to see that happen. People like Michelle Malkin, Tammy Bruce, and Nikke Finke over at Deadline Hollywood are the bloggers we most admire — because everything they do is done with their own trademark flare and style. And their content output is just so incredible.
We’d like to be the gay, moderate, male version of all that. We know it will take a lot of work, but hopefully you will continue to offer your ideas and help us improve…and, as always, help us reach a larger audience.
Today we’re going to be on The People Power Hour radio show again, which will be fun. If you like hearing us on the radio and would like to see us do more shows, we’d love it if you’d contact radio programs and tell them you want to hear us on their shows. Particularly as we move into daily syndication-worthy columns…we’d have something to talk about every day right there that would almost always be based on whatever’s going on in the news that day…so we’d be daily ready-made guests.
There are a lot of other fun things we have in our wish book for the new site…with a lot more tales of Boystown and some arm-twisting from Robby to get his mother Pattymelt to write in more often as well. We’d like to do a weekly Boystown piece, and have a weekly update from Mineral City too — longer pieces that would run on Saturday and Sunday for entertainment and information, with a little mystery and adventure thrown in. There are so many adventures that happen each week here in Boystown and Mineral City that we think it could be a fun experience to update the latest once a week from both us HillBoyz and the Mineral City Coffee Club.
We really love hearing from all of you, so please keep chiming in. Remember, we get an awful lot of hatemail every day from the Left telling us how much they want us to get AIDS and die and informing us of all the evil things they want to do to us — so hearing from nice people out there with constructive ideas is a major blessing. You will never know how much one kind word from one of you out there makes up for 10 attacks from Daily Kos or DemocraticUnderground. We might not be able to write back to everyone, but we love the ideas and tips, and it’s amazing having tens of thousands of eyes out there watching everything that’s going on, like Hera’s mighty Argus and his peacock progeny. Ever vigilant, never sleeping, constantly in touch. It’s so much cooler than the Ghost-to-Ghost network the Three Investigators used in the mystery books we loved as kids, because we have the wonders of the Internets (that series of pipes and tubes) at our disposal, while Alfred Hitchcock’s detective crew had walkie talkies and pay phones. We’ve come a long way, baby.
We get to be Five Investigators (well, Four, plus a Panda), with top-shelf research and observational help that seemingly never sleeps, and chimes in from every state in this amazing country, with Australia, France, Ireland, Israel, India, Canada, Germany, Great Britain, Iceland, and Mexico too. There are hundreds of things the MSM refuses to cover that Americans need to know about. Perhaps, with your help, we can do the job the Pulitzer Prize winning Ivy League set no longer deigns to do.
It’s amazing what this little Chicago campaign site evolved into with your support, and we are very grateful for everything.
Trust us when we say we appreciate fully the opportunity we have in front of us to put all of this to use to save America from the Left and its socialist takeover. That’s why we believe we exist, and rest assure we won’t shirk that duty. If someone or something out there really is calling us, we think we’re answering that call as best we can.
Thank you so much again. If you continue to support us, we’ll promise to work hard every day for you and this country.
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Oh, also, it’s embarrass Sebastian time again. He has a blind date tonight set up by that matchmaker friend of ours — with someone who is not a dancer, model, actor, musician, or stripper, but a responsible, age-appropriate, early 30s professional. The kind of guy we want Sebastian to date. Instead of 24 year old barbacks named Jacobi who dance in burlesque shows. So, here’s wishing Bast good luck with Clint…and kind of hoping he never makes it this deep into the thread to see that we told you about the date. He kind of hates when we do that. Whoops.
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Feedback on the way forward: ideas for our new site
Behind the scenes, we’re putting together an action plan for us to move away from WordPress and create a new site that will be uniquely or own, with a lot more flexibility to express ourselves and turn HillBuzz into a real force of nature all our own.
What we want to be is a place for daily political analysis, humor, satire, social commentary, and anecdotes about life in Boystown, Chicago. We’ll continue to track the careers and adventures of people we like in the political world, but will try to take the next step up and push ourselves into daily activism, with Action Items tailor made to impact the political process instead of just commenting on it.
We’re conservative/moderate former Democrats who are wholly alienated from the Socialist-Democrat party. We will never be Republicans, and are more or less independent at this point, as we no longer recognize the DNC…not after all Leftists have done for the last two years.
We want to continue to build a community of moderates, independents, and conservatives who love America and want to stop the Left and its socialist takeover. We also want to show the world that the LGBTQ community is much more diverse than what The Advocate or Genre teach you. AND, likewise, we want to show Boystown that all of you out there in red states are good people to know, despite what the DNC preaches.
We have a unique little niche here. We want to grow it, to really commit to making this place something special, and to build a structure to be around for a very long time.
So, we want to know, what do you like best about us that you don’t want to see change?
What things do you wish we would do?
What would you most like to see in a new site?
Do you like the idea of us hosting our own radio show and podcasts?
Would you be interested in us pursuing some Hannah Giles/James O’Keefe investigative projects here in Chicago, with a video series on topics related to corruption?
Where do you see us evolving, and what do you think we should do to get there?
It’s been a weird journey for all of us here. This site originated as just a little clearing house for articles on the 2008 primaries, meant solely for the 300 or so people on our Team Hillary email list. Two years later, we have readers all around the world and just passed 8 million hits. It’s been a real struggle to write the 15,000 or so words a day we post here, and the 10-15 articles we run daily. There were many times when we resented the effort this all took, and wished we could have our old lives back without this responsibility. For the longest time, the trolls, the hatemail, and the attacks on us from the Left made us ask ourselves everyday why we were doing this and for what reason we were putting ourselves through this.
But, honestly, we think we’re standing up for America every day on this little corner of the Internet. We stand up for the good people we love and respect in this world. We raise a voice of reason to hector the deserving. We hope we carry a little of Ben Franklin’s spirit, in using humor and satire to ridicule the powerful, and powerfully self-absorbed.
We’ve accepted that HillBuzz has become a permanent part of our lives. We’re touched by all of you out there who tell us we’re a daily must-read for you, and that through us you’re connecting not only with moderate Democrats and Hillary guys, but that you also are changing your opinions, even slightly, on the LGBTQ community because you now “know” us. That gives us chills to think about, because it’s something we don’t think actual gay publications ever accomplish, something we never see anyone else in Boystown doing.
Maybe we fell into all of this for a reason. Perhaps there’s an unseen hand guiding us. We know we keep working hard every day because of your encouragement…and that we would not be able to do anything without you.
So, we want to hear from you.
Tell us what you like about HillBuzz and what you’d like to see us add going forward. We don’t know how long the remodeling will take, because we are not tech guys in the slightest, but we really feel it’s time to move to the next level now that we’ve accepted the simple fact that we never want to stop doing this, not as long as we think America needs guys like us to tell it like it is, even if not all of you out there agree with us every day.
We hope it’s not sappy to say this, but we’ve grown to love many of you very much. Though we may never meet, you’ve all become a part of our lives, and we can’t thank you enough for your encouragement and support. We know how blessed we are — and pursuant to that, we want to really buckle down, improve, and become even better at the things you like going forward.
So, chime in…and help us brainstorm today.
Strong talking point against Obamacare: Democrats exempted themselves from it
We think this could be DEVASTATING in campaign ads: the simple fact that Democrats chose to exempt themselves and their staffs from Obamacare.
They actually wrote that into the bill that was passed on Sunday, that Democrats in Congress and the White House and their families and staffs won’t be forced into Obamacare.
If what they put forward was so good, and if Americans are all now mandated to be part of this, then how can Democrats decide this law won’t apply to them?
How is it Constitutional for these people to not only legislate that Americans are now forced to purchase products against their will, but that an elite section of the country won’t be forced to do anything it doesn’t want to do?
Could this, too, be a Constitutional challenge this monstrosity — this ’tis for thee but not for me business?
Americans are in a bad relationship with their government — will they break up?
Last night, we were all talking here at Buzzquarters about the state of this country, and we came to realize that Americans are in a bad relationship with their government, but don’t necessarily realize it…yet.
This is similar to the bad relationship Sebastian had with his ex, David…and in all truth, with his ex mother-in-law, Louella, since she insisted on wedging herself into every facet of their lives, like a bad, true-life, cartoon caricature of an always-wrong meddler.
The mother-in-law from, if not Hell itself, then one of its dingier suburbs.
Like Richmond Heights, Ohio.
For three years, we watched Sebastian and David together and just shook our heads, because we all knew they’d break up someday, since they were both miserable all of the time, mainly because of the crazy things Louella did to sabotage their relationship.
That woman forever came up with the most ridiculous things to drive Sebastian and David apart. Walking down the street, she’d practically grab strangers and tell them, “This is my homosexual son, David. And that’s David’s homosexual partner, Sebastian. They’re homosexuals and I accept them. I am a wonderful mother. Look how accepting I am of these two homosexuals!”
No, Louella, you aren’t wonderful. Unless you are traveling in BizarroWorld where people say “goodbye” instead of “hello” and “terrible person few like” means “wonderful”. That’s a place where cats chase dogs, rain falls up, and your feet don’t stink like moldy garbage.
You also don’t really accept anyone. The fact you feel the need to use the word “homosexual” 17 times while introducing your son and his boyfriend to people always told us you have a deep-rooted problem with your gay son and must go out of your way to use cold, clinical terms to seem PC and friendly – while you spend night and day thinking of ways to break your son and his boyfriend up…the way you broke up every relationship David has had.
Increasingly, we see the Socialist-Democrat party as Louella on steroids.
Manipulative.
Single-minded.
Agenda-driven.
Chaos-fueled.
Moonbat crazy.
The relationship Americans have with their government is being fundamentally changed by these Socialist-Democrats. It’s causing tension. Pressure. Stress.
The things Socialist-Democrats are doing in office, and to the Constitution, are the equivalent of Louella coming to visit for weeks at a time, rearranging Sebastian and David’s apartment, getting rid of things of Sebastian’s she didn’t like (such as his smurf clock), all the while claiming to know what was best for everyone involved (no…smurf clocks…EVVVVVVER!).
Please.
That woman never had a handle on her own life, let alone the lives of others. She’s been married three times, cheated on every one of her husbands, and has all of three friends because she’s alienated everyone she knows (and two of those friends are dogs, who only like her because she keeps liver snaps in her pockets…though we’ve never been 100% sure those treats are for the dogs, and not something Louella herself would find a yummy reward for various medium-grade random acts of evil throughout the day).
Socialist-Democrats don’t know what’s best for any of our lives, yet they insist on Louella-ing themselves into our homes, rearranging our lives, tossing out things we think are good and replacing them with the absurdity they believe in. They give lip service to minority groups like blacks and gays, but what do Democrats really think of these people? Like Louella, they use all the politically correct terms. They say “African-American” and “Homosexual”, but we know they’re thinking “stupid n*****” and “f****** f*****”. Their actions routinely speak louder than words.
Socialist-Democrats keep blacks poor, uneducated, and dependent on the entitlement system, because that keeps them loyal Democrat voters. Prosperous blacks fully integrated into society without a grievance mindset would start voting their economic interests, which would make them look a lot more like Michael Steele, Condoleezza Rice, and Michael Williams and a lot less like Al Sharpton, Henry Gates, and Jesse Jackson (RAAAACISM! WAAAAAH! RAAAACISM IS TO BLAME FOR EVERYTHING!).
The Socialist-Democrat Party claims it supports the LGBTQ community, but it’s as sincere as Louella introducing her son and his boyfriend to randoms at the mall, insisting how proud she is of her “homosexual son and his homosexuality”. Did she mention David’s a homosexual? Because he is. Homosexual. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Really. The reason Louella keeps using clinical terms for sexual identity to describe her son, to cats and dogs and birds she happens upon, is because she has a real problem with him but knows, as the youngest of her children and the one most likely to be stuck with her some day, she needs to keep him in her corner. He’s gullible enough to think she supports him, and has been carefully taught by her to see her constant use of “homosexual this and homosexual that” to describe him as strong parental support. Well, let us tell you that Robby’s mother, Patricia, is the poster woman for PFLAG. Her son’s “homosexuality” isn’t something she addresses with mailboxes, street lamps, and statues in the park. Robby’s gay. Pattymelt’s cool with it. She’s like Debbie Novotny on steroids at Pride, rainbow-festooned like nobody’s business, but none of us have ever heard the woman use the cold, clinical, PC term “homosexual”, about Robby, any of us, or even randoms like Richard Simmons or Tom Cruise.
Socialist-Democrats are a lot like Louella in that they constantly manipulate people they need for their future purposes, using political correctness and lip service to keep them forever in their fold. It’s sad that David, as well as the black and LGBTQ communities, falls for this garbage. We doubt any of them will wake up anytime soon.
But, increasingly, many former Democrats like ourselves — moderate, conserative, and newly independent — are indeed waking up to the wake that our current government has been hijacked by leftist lunatics. We want Washington interfering in our lives and telling us what to do as much as Sebastian ever wanted Louella to occupy his apartment here in Boystown for extended periods of time, holding court and changing daily life to “Louella Rules”.
That’s when the fridge could only have things that were white or yellow in it, since Louella followed a bizarre nutritional regiment called “The Golden Diet” — eggs, American cheese, skim milk, cottage cheese, popcorn, creamed corn, tapioca pudding, Lorna Dune cookies, sour cream, cauliflower, anything white or yellow. Nothing green, red, blue, brown, orange, or colorful was allowed because Louella believed, with cultish passion, that “colored foods caused cancer”. Essentially, she was a food racist, and whenever she visited she made Sebastian and David eat only yellow and white food in her presence.
Promptly after which Sebastian headed to Nookie’s Tree for as much colorful food as possible, because he was damn sure Louella wasn’t going to dictate what he ate, when he ate it, and what he could spend his money on the way she did with David.
Louella might have controlled her son, the way Socialist-Democrats control the government right now, but she was never going to get Sebastian to submit to her madness or tolerate her more than he absolutely had to.
Ultimately, Louella succeeded in driving Sebastian and David apart, and Bast was sad for a few months because he really loved David, but quickly realized how nice it was to not have Louella as a daily part of his life anymore. Once David moved out, he didn’t hear from him again for two years, and he never once missed the nightly phone calls from Louella that put ideas in David’s head that picked fights when prior to her phoning in everything was wine and roses here in Boystown for the two of them. But, Louella brought the thorns, with gusto. When she no longer had the power to terrorize him, and was sufficiently relegated to a minor player in his world he very rarely thought about, Sebastian took a large step back and realized just how crazy she was, and how he’d never again date a guy with a Louella of his own.
This is what we think is going to happen to America sooner than later.
Americans are going to be like Sebastian and reexamine their relationship with their own David, the government. They’re going to take a look at the extreme and irrational influence the Louella of politics has on this country, and they are going to be as glad to vote Socialist-Democrats out of office as Sebastian was to see Louella marginalized and removed from his life.
Just as Sebastian won’t get into a relationship with another guy who brings a Louella with him, we can’t imagine Americans choosing to embrace future governments that are Socialist-Democrat controlled.
It took having the mother-in-law from Hell for three years for Sebastian to realize just how bad a partner’s parents could be. Before Louella, all of us, in fact, thought people like this existed only in cartoons — and not Richmond Heights, Ohio.
But, once a lesson like Louella is learned, it won’t soon be forgotten.
Though things might seem tough now — like being forced to eat off the “Golden Diet” menu and seeing your apartment ransacked and rearranged by a loon — trust us when we say this madness won’t last long.
Americans might have to put up with it for three more years.
Ironically enough, that was the length of Sebastian and David’s relationship.
But, it will be over eventually.
And when it is, believe us when we say America will never again allow a Louella to take control of our government…not for several generations.
