Archive for January 21st, 2009
This explains EVERYTHING
According to PerezHilton, the reason Michelle Obama looked the way she did last night at the Inaugural Balls is because the man who designed her Wilma Flinstone Marries Mr. Coffee dress, Jason Wu, is better known for designing gowns for transexuals and female impersonators, such as drag queen par excellance RuPaul Charles.
Wu crafted gowns for “America’s Number One Transexual”, Amanda LePore, pictured below with Wu:
Three people Jason Wu has designed for include drag queen RuPaul, transexual Amanda LePore, and our new First Lady, Michelle Obama
And then he made this dress for Michelle:
Inspired by this:
Made from these:
Reminiscent of this:
With the net effect of:
Kirsten Gillibrand should be the next Senator from New York
We ran a larger piece on this last week, but despite Politico.com (and Ben Smith especially) repeatedly insisting it was a “done deal” for HRH Princess Caroline of Kennedy to be appointed Hillary Clinton’s replacement in the Senate, we could not see why Governor David Paterson would jeopardize his own 2010 election, and possibly take down Chuck Schumer, by given into the whims of a former president’s daughter.
If Amy Carter wanted to be a Supreme Court Justice, should she be taken seriously?
What if Lucy Baines Johnson wanted to be Postmaster General?
Dora Koch Bush for Surgeon General?
Well, if Bush had her own show on CNN, apparently that one would be possible.
For the rest of them, it’s nice their fathers were president at one point in time, but it’s nicer that these women have made their own ways in the world, accepting their own realistic challenges and establishing themselves in their own right, on their own two feet, not cradled in the arms of ghosts or installed in artificial glory at the feet of Memory.
There is nothing that has provoked and offended us more passionately than Princess Caroline’s demands to become a United States Senator, just because she suddenly felt like it. There is a very good chance that if Paterson had indulged her, we would have moved to New York for part of 2010 just to campaign day and night against both Paterson and Kennedy, when the two of these unelected officials faced voters for the first time to keep positions they inherited.
It would have been an unforgettable slap at Hillary Clinton to award her hard-won seat to a celebrity dilettante, particularly one who campaigned against Clinton last year (even if it was to disastrous results: wasn’t Princess Caroline supposed to win Massachusetts, New York, and California for Obama in the primaries? How well did the Kennedy magic work when applied there?).
So, today is a victory for common sense and decency.
Tomorrow, there will surely be table at Pastis waiting for Princess in Manhattan, where she’ll lunch with her socialite friends, and they’ll all cry into their diamonds how Princess was robbed, just robbed, and lament what a wonderful Senator Princess would have been, like, you know.
And then they’ll start planning trips to visit her in London when Princess takes up as Ambassador to the Court of St. James. Just watch. It’s going to happen. It would be Ambassador to France, but her French is embarrassing.
But, Kennedy would have never helped Paterson win in 2010, no matter what Politico.com claimed. There were no votes that would go to Paterson anyway that Kennedy would have brought him. Democrats who revere Kennedy just because of who her father was are Democrats who would already dutifully line up to vote for Paterson anyway. Black voters are already behind Paterson, because blacks race-vote and Paterson’s black, so that’s one group that’s firmly locked-up.
What Politico always failed to mention is that Chuck Schumer is going to be on the 2010 ballot as well. He brings the Catholics, the Irish, the Italian, and the Jewish Democrats who’ve always voted for him, and who like him. While they are re-electing Schumer, they will vote for Paterson. They would have voted for Kennedy too, but they would vote for any Democrat. They are loyal partisans.
The people Kennedy would NOT bring in would be independents and Republican crossovers. There is no urge or incentive for these people to vote for Democratic royalty, or to reward Paterson with a Governor’s term for appointing an entitled aristocrat to a Senate seat. Especially when Princess has never done a thing of importance or merit with her privileged life, other than editing a few books of children’s poems, handing out awards at her father’s library, and “co-authored” two books on the Constitution with anothe woman who suspiciously seems to have done most of the work (imagine that).
Kirsten Gillibrand will bring independents and crossover Republicans to the polls.
She’ll bring an upstate balance to the ticket.
She’s a hardworking, accomplished woman who’s spent her life earning her way in the world, not wearing her mother’s tiaras and trading off her father’s name.
THAT’S whom Paterson should appoint to the Senate. Someone who deserves to be there and will work hard for the people of New York.
Imagine that!
UPDATE: Not that Politico.com is right about much, but they’re reporting news vans are camped outside Kirsten Gillibrand’s home in upstate New York. Politico.com WAS the first to talk about reporters following Joe Biden around a few days before he was picked to be Vice President (when everyone else in the media was claiming it would be Tim Kaine or Evan Bayh). But, Politico has been the loudest voice proclaiming Princess Caroline as Paterson’s Senate pick.
So, maybe those vans just really love Gillibrand’s neighborhood for some unrelated reason. Like, maybe there are really cute squirrels there or something.
Sour Caroline
America's one-gloved wonder is tired of wanting to be a Senator, and now wants to be an astronaut. We still think she'd make a fabulous drag queen.
HRH Princess Caroline of Kennedy withdrew her name from consideration to be Hillary Clinton’s replacement in the Senate, ending several months of awkwardness where Princess embarrassed herself repeatedly in public and made Governor Paterson himself look foolish for enabling and encouraging her delusions of grandeur for so long.
This is a republic, not a monarchy, Princess.
If you want to be a Senator, then run for the school board or state senate. Follow Obama’s lead and become a community organizer. Follow Clinton’s lead and devote yourself publicly and whole-heartedly to a cause you believe in, where you are so tired at the end of the day from working hard for others that you collapse into bed at night, only to dream about the thousand things you need to do in the morning when you rise at the crack of dawn to get back at it again.
Do this every day for, oh, eight years or so, and then we’ll talk about you deserving to be a Senator.
Waking up at eleven just in time for lunch at Pastis, followed by some light shopping at Bergdorf’s before attending a black tie reception in the Temple of Dendur at the Met is just not enough.
No matter how fabulous you look in your sparkly dress with one glove. Take the diamonds off, get your hands dirty for the first time in your life, walk amongst mere mortals, and don’t expect or demand any privilege because your father was president, your uncle was a senator, and your other uncle let a woman drown in an icy river 39 years ago.
Because “being a Kennedy” does not qualify you to serve the people of New York, since “being a Kennedy” is a mixed moral bag depending on which Kennedy is on display, or who’s bellied up to the bar.
To ease Princess’ embarrassment, just watch for Obama to name her Ambassador to the Court of St. James.
They will both claim this is why she withdrew her name for the Senate seat, because Obama desperately needs her as his representative to Great Britain. The aristocrats abroad will adore her, and welcome her into their nest with great whoops of ostrich feathers and the ringing of golden bells.
The Kennedy “royal family” has a lot to answer for, cosmically — for what Princess’ grandfather did as Ambassador to the Court of St. James in the lead-up to World War II. The Kennedys have often not been on the side of right, until it was advantageous to them. It’s true, Joseph Kennedy sent two sons into battle against the Axis powers, but before that, as the American ambassador to the Court of St. James, he gave Neville Chamberlain a run for his accommodating money. Just in case Germany could win. A Kennedy never wanted to be on the losing side of anything.
“Camelot” was a brilliant reinvention of a family that made its fortune rum-running through secret tunnels under Boston, a mythic tapestry woven by the media since the 60s that’s mercifully balding and threadbare in large spots today. Maybe “Camelot” can be retired for keeps once Senator Kennedy roars his last in the Senate, and answers to powers above for what he did to Mary Jo Kopechne.
It’s hilarious what a miscalculation Caroline and Ted Kennedy made in backing Obama over the Clintons. From where we sat, it was clear the Kennedys did this to maintain their preeminence as the sole American political power family (at least on the Democrats’ side). Having two presidents in one Democratic family just wouldn’t do, because the Kennedys never got that, and the Kennedys cling bitterly to those last rags of Camelot.
The Kennedys need to be special. The Kennedys need to be royal. The Kennedys need to matter.
But, in creating a new epic tale in Obama, in making him a new phenomenon, the Kennedys eclipsed themselves with someone fresh and new — who made every crack and wrinkle on Caroline and Ted show glaringly in the klieg lights of CHANGE!, and suddenly this pair seemed so lackluster and yesterday.
The irony is that President Hillary Rodham Clinton would have probably paved the way for Caroline to become the new Senator Kennedy. The atmosphere would have been very different, since Caroline’s backstabbing of Clinton would not have weighed on Democrats in New York, who surely not only pressured Paterson to pass Princess over, but probably had a lot to do with the terrible coverage Princess has received since announcing she, all of a sudden, you know, wanted to play Senator.
Tomorrow, of course, she’ll want to be an astronaut.
Or maybe a rodeo clown.
Or the Empress of Mars.
Whatever Princess wants, Princess gets.
Oh, wait, that’s not exactly true anymore. Is it?
And then there’s every nasty sling and arrow Democrats sent at Sarah Palin, and all the laughter Tina Fey inspired at the accomplised Governor’s expense. Princess never saw that backlash coming.
Democrats can’t spent two months ripping a mother of five to shreds, claiming she’s inexperienced (when she was twice-elected to the school board, twice-elected as Mayor of her home town, sat on the Oil and Gas commission, ran for Lieutentant Governor, and became the youngest and first female Governor of the largest state in the Union, maintaining sky-high approval ratings all the way), using celebrities and TV shows to berate and humiliate her on a personal level, and not expect HRH Princess Caroline of Kennedy to have a rough time accepting her new crown when, compared to the accomplishments of GOVERNOR and former MAYOR Sarah Palin, Princess looks like all she’s done is sat around eating cookies and drinking all day — for the last 50 years.
There is nothing that’s put out into the world that doesn’t come back tenfold at the sender. Whether that’s love or hate, positivity or averice, it’s all boomarangs, folks.
Princess lost her coveted Senate seat because of a handful of things she personally, and Democrats collectively, did, in 2008 and over a lifetime, that came back to bite her pampered, you know.
You know?
UPDATE: Read the comments on this thread at Politico.com We’d love your insight into why Obama’s followers hate Princess Caroline so much. Politico.com long ago became infested with Kool-Aid trolls. It is an almost 100% pro-Obama site, with pro-Obama comments. So, where does the Princess hate come from? It’s a real mystery to us, as we would expect Obama’s followers to support Princess because Obama supports her.
Why is there this break, and what does that mean for Obama going forward, if his followers don’t keep lockstep with him? This is really interesting, with many implications going forward.
Dick Cheney was the most pro-gay Vice President in history
Oh, we can just imagine the comments this one’s going to get, but it is an interesting read by B. Daniel Blatt that highlights the support Dick Cheney gave the gay community in 8 years of the Bush Administration: more than any Vice President before him.
One of the most revealing moments of the 2008 campaign was when Joe Biden admitted the Democratic ticket shared the same policy on gay rights that McCain/Palin did. Either this was the greatest Republican ticket for gay rights that’s ever been run, or Democrats are just damn lucky the LGBT community’s so thoroughly brainwashed into partisan lockstep voting that they’ll never vote in their true best interests.
There remains an ongoing campaign to attack Sarah Palin as the new Anita Bryant, but Palin’s done more for gay rights in Alaska than Obama or Biden ever did in Illinois or Delaware combined.
Hillary Clinton, who’s marched in pride parades since she was First Lady (and who has a lifetime of support of LGBT issues to her credit), was the gold standard of presidential candidates in 2008, but the rest of the Democrats fell far short of equaling her commitment to gay rights. Obama completely blew off Chicago’s Gay Pride Parade on June 29th, and instead got a haircut and played basketball that day (meanwhile, on that same day, John McCain met with Log Cabin Republicans to talk about LGBT issues. No haircut or basketball for him).
This article from Blatt is eye-opening and made us see Cheney in a whole new light. He’s another one that’s mocked and ridiculed in the gay community, when in reality he’s far from the villain he’s made out to be. The religious right’s attacks on gays will always color perceptions of Republicans, and that’s largely why Cheney’s support for LGBT issues has gone unnoticed.
Nothing is ever as black or white as partisan interests will have us believe, especially with issues under the rainbow, or radar, when re-evaluating Cheney in the days ahead.
Year One, Day Two in the Golden Age of Obama
There’s a terrible movie called Idiocracy with Luke Wilson and Maya Rudolph, who are cryogenecially frozen for hundreds of years and awake in a future where the world’s covered in garbage, most people are idiots, and the President of the United States is a razzle-dazzle showman with great flare but no substance.
Just something to catch on TV late at night if you ever have the chance. Prescience comes in the strangest places at times.
In other news, today the crowd estimates for the Inaugural are bumped down again. No official number, but now news outlets are saying “more than a million” showed up. That’s down from the 1.4 million ABC claimed yesterday, and the “close to 2 million” other networks ran with all day. All of it’s a far cry from the 3-5 million Obama’s transition team crowed about. None of this is either here or there, but it’s just interesting because the same thing happened here in Chicago on Election Night: Obama’s team said more than a million would show up in Grant Park for his big Election Night-a-palooza, and about 200,000 actually turned out. In everything we have seen, there is a wide gap between what’s promised by the Obama brand and what’s actually delivered. The lackluster Inaugural Address yesterday was a huge letdown, and so is the sight of the National Mall trashed so thoroughly by Obama’s followers — who say things like “we want change” and “we’re going to heal the world”, but then leave the Capital looking like Thunderdome.
We don’t need another hero — just people who will do what they say, and say what they’ll do.
And if they start with picking up their own trash, that would be really nice. So much for the “green Inaugural”.
Hope!
Change!
Litter!
Former President Bush's Welcome Home in Texas
Former President George W. Bush and former First Lady Laura Bush arrive in Midland, Texas for their welcome home celebration.
It’s a very fun clip — and both seem thrilled to be back in Texas.
We said it before but will say it again: thanks to them both for their service for the past eight years. We look forward to someday meeting the two of them and thanking them in person…hopefully in Texas, too!
For the record, THIS is how you wear a one-shouldered gown with style and class
THIS is how you wear a one-shouldered evening gown with style and class.
Michelle Obama, meet Nancy Reagan, and say hello to FABULOUS.
Proof a dress like this can be worn WITHOUT looking like Wilma Flintstone covered in prehistoric dryer lint:
Or, come to think of it, Bjork, and whatever she was smoking thinking that strange, strange day:
But, surprisingly, the Wilma Flinstone Marries Mr. Coffee gown Michelle wore to the balls tonight is still not the worst thing we’ve ever seen her in though. That would be THIS:
She really needs a very special episode on the next season of Project Runway. And it has to be one of the ones where they can go to an actual store and buy real fabric to make normal clothes. Not like when they send contestants to the grocery store to make dresses out of toilet paper and corn husks (or Granny’s old upholstery patterns).
Been there, worn that.
And if Tim Gunn can’t help Michelle, no one can.
Somebody please call him.
Does the red hotline emergency phone still work?
